None, I say! No more!

Oh How I Love Thee, My New Reusable Plastic Candle Holder

How safe I feel from the burning ember, held mere inches from my oddly flammable hands as I worship! How secure I feel in the knowledge that liquefied candle wax will never again sear my prayerful palms! How stylish appear thy polymers, perched below my candlestick like a wineglass bowl, slowly filling with the nectar of sweet, scented, midnight supplications!

Yet you sit there, faithfully defending the flock and the frocks of the elders choirs all across the planet! All thanks unto you, reusable plastic candle holder! Never again will the praise of the people be punctuated by the screech of sirens and the groans of grieving grandchildren! God be praised indeed!

What is this? Printed here, boldly upon thy noble and honest packaging, is the word ‘reusable’! Monies will be saved! Again you have blessed us, oh reusable plastic holder! Long will we have funds to purchase additional candles! For years to come we will hold vigil for our Lord and Saviour with no thought toward expenditures so costly such as disposable paper candle-hilts, new carpeting, and costly litigation! But surely your services must cost a small fortune given the massive savings.

At What Cost Have We Loved Thee?

No, say you? Mere pennies apiece, and available at 25 pieces per case? Will wonders never cease? Oh how we praise thee, oh saver of hands, oh frugal of finances, and oh helper of holy observances. You make our services safe and maintain our brightly burning flames.

Please accept our humble thanksgiving, from church candles everywhere! We thank you, the Lord thanks you, as does the choir of senior ladies. Now and again we just need to let our hair down and enjoy how much we have changed church in the last half century. When my dad was a pastor years ago, his church’s reusable candle holders were ushers wearing leather gloves! Are we thankful for progress? Yes. Are candle holders it? Well yes, but I’m still holding out hope there’s a fix for sticking Bible pages.

This was a bit tongue-in-cheek, but every once in a while it’s good to have a little fun in church. Sadly, most people would be surprised to find out Jesus had a sense of humor. I believe God has a sense of humor – He made me. Before you laugh too hard remember He also made you. The above mentioned products are available at most online Christian stores; the fun you will have to manufacture on your own. Favour on you!

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lifeofthebeatles.blogspot.com The Beatles gave their final full concert ever at Candlestick Park on August 29th, 1966. Songs performed at the show were “Rock And Roll Music”, “She’s A Woman”, “If I Needed Someone”, “Day Tripper”, “Baby’s In Black”, “I Feel Fine”, “Yesterday”, “I Wanna Be Your Man”, “Nowhere Man”, “Paperback Writer”, and “Long Tall Sally”. Candlestick Park (also commonly referred to as Candlestick or The Stick) is an outdoor sports and entertainment stadium located in San …

“The Slunk, The Gutter, and The CandleStick Maker” by Buckethead. This song is from the album Kaleidoscalp.

A rare recording of The Beatles playing at Candlestick Park. Songs: Paperback Writer, and I’m Down (Cut.)

A rare Beatles concert from Candlestick Park while playing Paperback Writer.

Dancing Dick and Nard are human candlestick holders on 92.1 the beat with The Big Mad Morning Show…. www.921thebeat.com

The Fame Bureau investigate a rare artifact from the Beatles concert at Candlestick Park, Ted Owen the world’s leading expert examines the item.

Rare recording of The Beatles playing at Candlestick Park – Day Tripper, Baby’s In Black, I Feel Fine.